This blog is about my struggles and triumphs after getting out of an abusive relationship. It's not easy. I have lost a lot of who I was, as well as friends, and have been made to feel ashamed for speaking up about what happened to me. But for every one person out there who would say I should stay quiet, I have had amazing friends stand by and support me and encourage me to speak up. I want everyone who reads this to know there is a safe place out there for you, and there are people willing to listen and love you. I thought I was alone, for so long. All I needed to do was stand up and say something.
I am very fortunate that I was able to walk away from what I went through. Compared to the stories of women I have met since coming forward, I count myself most lucky: But emotional abuse leaves its own scars, ones that no one can see. It is a daily struggle for me, someone who is very proud and always said, "I would never let something like that happen to me." I don't like to think myself as a victim, but as a victor, who was able to stand up and leave and speak up about what I went through.
You will see a lot of reoccurring themes in this blog. Not just about the way I was treated, but coming to terms with how people react to those who come out about being in an abusive relationship. I also deal with a lot of guilt, for staying, and for partaking in things with this person that hurt other people.
I hope my story and struggles will help those who find this page. Not just people who have gone through abuse, but those who don't understand what it's like to be in an abusive relationship. It goes without saying that until this happened to me, I had no idea what someone who has been abused goes through. Like I said, it's easy to say you wouldn't put up with someone treating you like that - but I did. And worse, I mocked a girl who claimed the very same things I went through, and with this person.
And I know it sounds cliche, but even after all this - it does get better. Today, I am stronger than I was yesterday. I may still cry, and I may still be afraid, but every day does get a little bit better. And know that it will for you as well.
